More Fiasco
- Michael Jay Tucker's explosive-cargo
- Nov 2
- 5 min read
Okay, last time, I had us discovering that Judy didn’t have a Real ID, which meant she wouldn’t be able to fly back to Kansas.
Well, actually, in retrospect, we realized that she probably could have. The TSA has ways of dealing with the problem. If you don’t have a Real ID, they simply take you to an office and quiz you a bit. If you can prove your identity to them, they’ll happily send you on your way.
And we were pretty sure that TSA folks wouldn’t give us any trouble. After all, they’re not unreasonable people. We knew they’d take one look at the three of us...grayed-haired baby boomers with a cane, a walker, and faint but fading memories of painting orange peace symbols on our VW Beetles. Then, with a snort from one nostril and a chortle from the other, they’d shoo us through the metal detector.
Except...well...we weren’t 100% sure of that. We had this vision of the three of us getting to the airport, having the TSA folks pull us aside, and then saying, “Nope. No. NEIN. Nyet. Don’t even *think* about it.” Meaning that our luggage would have already been checked and was on its way to Wichita. How do we get it back? And we’d already paid for three tickets, which would be now null and void.
But there was worse. As I’ve said before, Judy is a working journalist. She absolutely HAD to be back to Winfield for a meeting with her Editor on Monday after we left on Friday. And she had to do some work on some outstanding stories. It HAD to be in person, because, you see, she’s a local reporter. Winfield is her beat. And she can’t do her stories at a distance, even in this age of cellphones and email.
So, if she missed that meeting and those deadlines...she’d have SERIOUS problems.
Not to worry, though. Michael The Marvelous...the Great Solver of Scheduling SNAFUs...the Brainiac of Business Travel...is on the case.
You betcha.
Anyway, I started looking around. Was there any way...other than driving and flying...of getting from Texas to Kansas? We looked for a while at Amtrak, the good old train. Turns out Amtrak is making a serious push to be an alternative to flying, at least now that planes are crowded and crazy and Air Traffic Controllers are being laid off by the dozen by DOGE.
And, for a while, I thought we had a winner there. Amtrak does (according to its website) have trains from Austin to Wichita.(1) They’re relatively inexpensive. You get lots of leg room (no cramping for Judy!) and, if you like, you can even get a private bedroom. I mean, holy jumping Murder On The Orient Express. How cool is that?
Except, then I remembered, Wichita (at the moment) doesn’t have a working train station. So how does the Amtrak train get there? Answer: the bus. At least when I last checked (I’m writing this on June 25, 2025), you take the train to Oklahoma City, OK. There, you catch a bus that takes you the rest of the way.
In retrospect, we should have taken it. But, at the time, it seemed unnecessarily complicated. I mean, heck, if you’re going to take a bus, why not just take one all the way?(2)
Which got me thinking? What about the bus? Gosh. It’s been years since I’ve done a Greyhound. I remember, why back when, back when I was in college, buses weren’t so bad. Lot of people took ‘em all over. “Go Greyhound and Leave the Driving to Us.” Remember that one? (3)
About the photos: First, a photo of Martha and Judy at the hotel in Austin while we getting up (very early) for the bus trip (more on that next time). Second, a bit more of my experimental close-up photography. This is a wire and post outside a field in Winfield. Third, Martha at breakfast at our local Monument Cafe here in Georgetown.
And, finally, here’s a little Runway ML video about my feelings about buses at the moment.
And I’d been reading articles lately about how people...even business travelers...were considering alternatives to cramped, expensive plane travel. And I heard that buses now had Wifi and electrical outlets. You could charge your phone and use your laptop. You could work on the way. I could write and ride at the same time. Far out.
I did some research on the web. There were several companies that offered their bus services as an alternative to plane travel. There’s a company here in Texas called RedCoach that offers “luxury” bus travel. “...foot rests...140 degree reclines...” (4)
And there’s another one: Vonlane, which I gather is at least as luxurious, maybe more. It has the same super-comfortable seats and work amenities, plus snacks, drinks, and even a meal if you want one. Each of the buses has its own “attendant,” like an airline steward/stewardess. (5)
It sounds like both companies would be kinda cool to try, and we’ll see if we can’t use them at some future date. But...but...there was a problem. We couldn’t take them to Kansas. Neither company goes outside of Texas. (Dang.)
That left Greyhound. At first I was kind of suspicious about Greyhound. I’ve heard some bad things about it over the last few years. But then I checked the website and learned that Greyhound is now owned by FlixBus, which is a German company known all over Europe.(6) Flixbus says it, too, has luxury buses, “Wifi...power outlets...enough space for your baggage...extra legroom...toilets...”
Well, now, I said. That sounds pretty good, I added. I had A Viable Option, I thought. Yes siree. That’s what I thought, all right.
Have you noticed that for a reasonably bright guy, I can be one damn dim bulb?
Just asking.
More to come.
Footnotes:
1. Amtrak, https://www.amtrak.com/home.html
2. There was also the small issue of the fact that it would have gotten us into Wichita at 12:45 am. As in, three little senior citizens in an empty bus station, in an unfamiliar city, in the middle of the night. What were we going to do then? Not the most workable combination.
3. “Go Greyhound and Leave the Driving to Us,” Wikipedia, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Go_Greyhound_and_Leave_the_Driving_to_Us
4. Redcoach, https://www.redcoachusa.com/.
5. Vonlane, Vonlane.com. Here’s a line from their marketing material “Ride Like The VIP You Are...Relax as your caring onboard attendant provides white glove service and a seamless travel experience.”
We actually learned about Vonlane from our son David, who used it a short while back to get from Houston to Austin. He said it was a great deal easier than driving, and far more comfortable than a commuter flight. But, still, he wondered if it was worth the cost.
6. Flixbus, flixbus.com. Later, I discovered that in Europe, Flixbus is considered the no-frills and not particularly comfortable but really cheap option. Had I but known...
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